Brianna, My Brother, and the Blog

And here's another uber-long post that you probably won't read brought to you by Katie Barker!

For my birthday, my mom bought me the book Brianna, My  Brother, and the Blog by Jack Weyland. Seeing as I love to blog, she thought it was the perfect book for me. Now, those of you who have read anything from Jack Weyland probably are familiar with his somewhat cheesy romance novels. And if you know me, you know that I love anything that is cheesy or romance filled. Since I had a feeling that this would be the case with this book, combined with the fact that it had the word "blog" in the title, I knew that I would thoroughly enjoy reading it. 


Well, my birthday was over two months ago. Although I hadn't forgotten about this book, I never got around to reading it. Okay, every now and then I read about five pages, and then put it down as I went off to do something else.  I would always put it in my backpack, hoping that I would have time to read it at work or inbetween classes, but this never was the case. However, today in a desperate search for something to do, I decided to go and read it. Not that I hate reading and I have to feel desperate to read or anything. Best decision I had made all day.  


I was instantly captivated by this book. I fell in love with the characters, and found the story very endearing. It also made me think. The blog that was written in this book by the main character "Austin", reminded me quite a bit of some of the anonymous men bloggers I have found over the past few months. Well, not like 
Mormon Bachelor Pad (no offense boys, I still love you), but more in the style of Gus, the BYU Dude or Sam Nanti. Seriously, I love when boys blog, especially anonymously. People seem to be a bit more honest that way. Even though I find myself way too curious as to who these people are. But, that's beside the point. 


Anyway. I couldn't put this book down and read it in a little over an hour. Although the ending was quite predictable and incredibly cheesy, it was such a happy, uplifting book. And it reminded me of a simple truth, that you should marry your best friend. Towards the end, the main girl in the book, Brianna, asks Austin(okay, I probably will ruin the book for you, so if you are planning on reading this book and don't want it to be ruined, read no further) if he loves her. He proceeds to say, "Oh, my gosh, are you serious? I love you more than I can even say . . ." to which she responds, "That's good. I was afraid that this was only good friendship." To that, he says, "That's what love is, isn't it? An amazingly good friendship?" (and just to set up the cheesiness of this scene, it took place on the front pew in the Provo Temple baptistry.)


No matter how cheesy that sounds, it's true. Who doesn't dream of marrying their best friend? Movies, books, celebrities . . . They all tell us that love is fast, full of passion, at first sight, and extremely physical. And at first thought, that doesn't sound too bad. Sometimes I feel like it would be nice just to run into a person on campus, and immediately fall in love. But then when I really think about it, I think I would much rather fall in love slowly with someone that truly is my best friend. Someone that you can talk to for hours without fail. Someone who knows your quirks and faults, but loves you nonetheless. Someone who knows you inside and out. Someone that you have silly jokes with that no one else finds funny, but you can laugh for hours about. Someone that complements you. Someone who makes you want to dance and do silly things. Perhaps some other cheesy statements that begin with "someone that" or "someone who". I truly believe that in most cases, being friends before dating is the best idea. I just feel that it's important to have that emotional relationship before a physical one ensues. Don't get me wrong, I know there are plenty of successful couples out there that started dating immediately after meeting, and I think that's awesome if it works out. But in general, and for me especially, that friendship first thing is important. Whether it's talking on the phone for hours and sending tons of emails, taking hour long walks around town, or even just sitting on the couch and talking . . . friendship comes from those simple acts, and as a result, love can ensue. Maybe I'm just biased, since my last relationship didn't work out, and we most definitely were not friends for long beforehand. 


Another line from this book I really liked was when Austin and Brianna were talking about how they wanted to be best friends forever, but that would only be possible if they were married. Which I agree with. I mean, really, I don't think I'd overly love my future spouse being like "well, I have this other girl who is my best friend, sorry!" Not saying that you should marry every person you consider a best friend. That would be silly. 


While I could quote things from this book for hours, this post is already way too long, and most have probably last interest before reading this. However, there's just one more part I want to write about. Austin wrote it on his blog, and I think anyone can heed its advice: 

"Guys, my advice is to slow down and begin to appreciate the women you're seeing. Appreciate how she smiles, how she laughs, how she bowls, how she crinkles her nose, even how she cares about those around her. Don't rush things. Court her, show kindness to her, listen to her, fall in love with her, get engaged to her, marry her, and then enjoy your time together."

I remember my dad often stating that you shouldn't rush the courtship of a relationship. It's a time to get to know that person without the financial obligations and stresses of life coming in the way. Obviously, you'll get to know your spouse more every day, and you won't know everything about them before marriage...But just paying attention to those small things are important. Truly get to know the person you're dating, like this aforementioned quote said. I mean, if people didn't take the time to get to know me after first meeting me, I'd probably have no friends and I'd likely never get married. For some reason when I first meet people, I tend to be kind of odd. Some might call it annoying. I call it being awesome. But I've realized that I do this in order to seperate the wheat from the tares. I mean, if I acted completely normal right off the bat, then later on when some off my odd tendencies start to come out, they might decide they hate me. So, I figure if someone thinks I'm weird at the beginning but still hangs out with me, they'll probably still like me when I act more normal later on, but still appreciate my quirks. Silly? Yes. But it works. I don't remember what my point was...But that's okay. 

So anyways. This was all kind of random, but just so I don't get lynched for anything, let me clarify. I do believe people can date for a week and have an extremely happy marriage, or date for years and have it end in divorce. I don't think you should marry someone that you consider to be your best friend if you aren't attracted to or aren't compatible with them. I'm not implying that I want to marry any of my close guy friends (Mom, I had to put that in because I know that's the first thing you'll think). Some of my thoughts on this stemmed from a post one of my blogger friends wrote earlier today (This awesome fella'). That, combined with this book just got my mind rolling, and I had to put my thoughts down somewhere. What better place than my blog?

I realize I talk about marriage and dating relatively often. So kill me. I'm Mormon and I go to BYU. It happens. I can almost guarantee that at least 1/2 of the students here think about marriage and dating on a regular basis (Mind you, I didn't say everyone). But you know what, I don't think there is anything wrong with that. Marriage, well, namely eternal marriage, is ordained of God and is essential for exaltation. I think people should think about it before they jump into it! There's no more important decision you will make in your life than who you marry. So before you judge me for being just another marriage hungry BYU girl,(which I truly am not. I do want to get married before I've reached spinster status, but at the same time, I'm scared to death of it. Blame all those wonderful marriage classes I've taken and all the stories of infidelity I've heard) just realize that I think about it a lot because I know when I get married, I want it to be forever. And I will marry my best friend. Heh, maybe it's a good thing that I'm always in the friend zone with guys...One day one of them will love me. (like they don't already!)